Thursday, February 09, 2012

moving with perseverance and hope

last year, we tried to sell our house.

we love this house. it has been our home for nearly 7 years and is the perfect house for us. it is warm and comfortable, has just the right amount of square feet, and we have our own private park in the backyard. we couldn't ask for better neighbors. these walls have seen so many good times. and truthfully, i don't want to move.

the problem with this house is where it's located: too far away from my husband's office. i am incredibly thankful for his job - he loves it and is thriving. but he spends more time now in the car on the way to and from work than he does here in our wonderful home with us. we miss him.

the thought of moving out of this home is heart-breaking, but to have my husband home more often is worth it. 

according to the world, "the market" was really bad. but, the state of the market did not scare me. the God i serve is way bigger than the market.

and still, i am human and impatient. i wanted so badly to move and get it over with- rip the band-aid off -i knew the process of leaving was going to hurt. my own impatience drove me crazy. selling a house is not something you can rush! despite the state of the market, a house will sell when the right buyer comes along. keeping that in mind, to keep myself grounded, i started making a list of things i was doing here that i would miss out on if we'd already moved 80+ miles away: celebrating a friend's birthday party, a playdate, swinging in the backyard, a nap on the couch, playtime with neighbors, meeting friends for lunch, MOPS, our church on Mother's Day, lunch at my favorite hole-in-the-wall restaurant...

after 6 months of staging and showing and seeing other houses sell and list-making and all the while still not having my husband home for dinnertime, our house didn't even come close to selling. i was discouraged. we took the house off of the market and said we'd try again later. i sat at the bottom of the stairs and cried my eyes off. and then i didn't vacuum for a week.

but i kept adding to the list, and the list encouraged me.

because we didn't move, Bubba was able to go to preschool in the same classroom BigGirl went when she was 3, and he met his new best friend. because we didn't move, i was able to help co-host the first Mamas Write conference and meet many local bloggers. because we didn't move, BigGirl was able to hike in the woods behind our house on her birthday again this year. every day that we are still here, i see something, experience moments, and make memories. and even though i still want my husband home more often, i thank God that we didn't move last year.

but i still want my husband home more often. he leaves for work before the sun rises and is home just before bedtime. for the sake of our family, we have to move. so we are trying to sell our house again.

this time, i won't get impatient. i won't vacuum like a madwoman. i won't be discouraged. i will keep adding to the list of blessings in the waiting.

for the sake of my family, i will not grow weary.

i still serve a great big God who is always good and has great plans for us, and He is the foundation of my hope. i will persevere with Him on my side. no matter what happens with this house, i will trust Jesus. i will stand confidently and joyfully, and look forward to giving God all the glory for the victory. i will wait patiently and trust His perfect timing.

Romans 5:1-5 is helping me get through this moving process with perseverance and hope: 

"and this hope will not lead to disappointment..." because i know how dearly God loves us.